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Baa baa black sheep~ hi, I'm back again.
And I'm really sad. Hol is ending. I can't believe my 7 weeks passed like that. Seriously can't believe. I don't rmb doing anything productive at all.. ARGH.
And.. uhm, Idk why but lately I'm in this mood where I deny everything. Like, the existence of things such as love, hope, humanity is good.. idk. Can't explain. But yes, I'm in denial of all this now. I believe that love, is just a temporary infatuation, a spark at a certain moment, and then, everything fades away and disappears. Humanity.. I have no faith in it. After all that I've been through, nope, not much hope in it. I think most of the world is darker than it appears to be. There might be a bit of light here and there, but most of us are dark. In fact, I don't believe that there's a totally good person existing. With no feelings such as jealousy, anger etc. Everyone's dark. Just a matter of how dark.
Urgh, I hate the world. Y'know, I think life would have been better if I was born earlier. Where when if something broke, people would fix it, and not abandon it. And when people actually treasured their lives, they were glad to be alive and all. Not at this age, where you gotta plan everything, look for the meaning to be alive. It's painful. And I think as the years go by, the world just gets darker. How I wish I could die now, and be born again in a time when people are.. real. The current world, disgusts me.
I disgust myself too.
Desires. Have we all succumbed to them?
Whose fault is it? Whose?
I don't know.
I don't have any desire for anything, anymore.